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I am not ROFL


Laughter is the best medicine or so it is said. But if this laughter comes at the cost of ridiculing someone, how can it be medicinal? I have often heard quite a few people say that they are in splits when they watch 'Comedy Nights with Kapil'. I agree that there is some wit and pun in it. But some parts are dehumanising as well.

There have been some episodes on the show which have brought up the issues of sex selective abortions, sexual harassment of women and these have conveyed the message that women are humans. But does that also mean that you dehumanise them?

What bothers me is the constant threads of characters like the wife, grandmother, aunt and the much loved Gutthi and Palak.  Why are they dehumanising? Because they are constantly ridiculed.

For example, if we consider the treatment of the wife, why is she and her natal family members always the butt of jokes? If this was happening to some of us in our private or social lives, we would definitely call it emotional or psychological violence. Then, why do we fail to see it here? How come we are willing to take her ridicule with a pinch of salt?

Is the aunt considered hilarious because she is still single 'at this age’? Oh my god, she is still single, how did that happen?! What a pity! So, that makes it OK for her to fall over every male guest on the show. Oh, I forgot, of course she is unmarried. That must, mean that she is desperate to find a 'husband'! She is constantly ridiculed and reminded, and through her so are we that marriage should be the sole aim and else she is a desperate woman, who does not mind all those cat-calls as often as she gets them.

No, there is more. The aunt could not remain unmarried for long, right? So, she must marry anyone who is ready, even if she has to settle for a ‘venerable goon’. All because she is beyond the age of marriage and no one else in their 'right mind' will agree to marry her!
                                                                       
In the same breath the grandmother is treated no better. So what if the character is a male-bodied woman? Would we be OK if a female-bodied woman who was falling over all the male guests in the show or kissing them despite the guests' discomfort? Wouldn't we be calling that harassment? Or is it OK because we know that under those clothes is a man? Or because 'she' is old and therefore it either 'cute' or she is allowed to behave this way because she is drunk? Do all drunken people behave this way? I am not sure why this is funny? In fact, I am still trying to figure this out. Although, what is funny is that some of us don't find this representation offensive.

 I am not saying that women don’t or shouldn’t drink, smoke or feel attracted towards men, but if we cry blue murder when we protest the portrayal of female-bodied women doing these things on screen, how come we have a different measuring scale when male-bodied women are doing this? I am quite confused as to how this if funny and where do these ideas of our funniness come from?

Why do male-bodied women have to jive, smooch/ kiss, sit on men's laps? I wonder if these characters are male-bodied so that no one finds it offensive that one of them drinks the other rolls on the floor / stage and sometimes gyrates or dances suggestively. These would be otherwise considered offensive on a 'family show'. Considering this is one, are these, the kind of messages that we want to give families, that it is OK for this behaviour when it comes from men, or that ridiculing 'real' women is fine too.

Is it possible to treat this as a family entertainer when it provides a token message about respecting women, while actually portraying them in a disrespectful manner? Or is hilarious and funny only possible if someone is being ridiculed?

It’snot like the Maharashtra Women Commission has not noticed one such factor, but will that mean that we can hope for some improvement in the show?

I could very well choose not to watch, but that ostrich approach won’t make these disrespecting and subtle messages against women stop!

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